1 00:00:15,171 --> 00:00:16,963 Dad, please don't do this. 2 00:00:17,046 --> 00:00:19,088 You can get a legal job for fuck's sakes. 3 00:00:19,171 --> 00:00:20,671 You just have to apply for some. 4 00:00:20,755 --> 00:00:22,588 Hortons is always looking for people. 5 00:00:22,671 --> 00:00:25,588 Yeah, for ten bucks an hour to sell coffee to dummies. Fuck that. 6 00:00:25,713 --> 00:00:28,088 That goes against one of my life rules. I don't work. 7 00:00:28,171 --> 00:00:29,880 The situation's bad. We're broke. 8 00:00:29,963 --> 00:00:32,755 But you could go to jail again. What is wrong with you idiots? 9 00:00:32,838 --> 00:00:34,005 Sweetheart, listen to me. 10 00:00:34,130 --> 00:00:36,630 We have no power. Julian's power is shut off now, too. 11 00:00:36,713 --> 00:00:38,588 Dope plants need grow lights, or they die. 12 00:00:38,671 --> 00:00:41,338 How'll poor Mo feel if he can't help Grampy grow his dope? 13 00:00:41,421 --> 00:00:43,630 -Mo's been helping you? He's four, Rick. -Yeah. 14 00:00:43,713 --> 00:00:46,880 He loves mixing up the different fertilizers and feeding them, 15 00:00:47,005 --> 00:00:49,171 spraying the poison to kill the bugs. 16 00:00:49,255 --> 00:00:51,796 Following right in Grampy's footsteps, aren't you, Mo-Mo? 17 00:00:51,880 --> 00:00:53,005 Hell yeah! 18 00:00:53,338 --> 00:00:55,046 That's right. He's really good at it. 19 00:00:55,130 --> 00:00:56,755 I love you, Trin. And don't worry. 20 00:00:56,838 --> 00:00:59,046 Julian has it figured out.  Nothing can go wrong. 21 00:00:59,796 --> 00:01:00,796 See you soon, buddy. 22 00:01:00,880 --> 00:01:02,130 Bye-bye, Grampy! 23 00:01:02,213 --> 00:01:04,213 Come on. Let's make some fucking money. 24 00:01:04,296 --> 00:01:05,380 Make Mo proud of me. 25 00:01:05,463 --> 00:01:07,463 Oh, boys! Oh, baby! 26 00:01:07,630 --> 00:01:10,463 Look out! Trying to keep it together! 27 00:01:10,546 --> 00:01:13,046 -Bubs, Bubs! -Can't. Shaking! 28 00:01:13,130 --> 00:01:14,713 -Can't breathe. -Breathe, breathe! 29 00:01:14,796 --> 00:01:15,963 Okay. There you go. 30 00:01:16,046 --> 00:01:17,338 -Okay. -What is it? 31 00:01:17,671 --> 00:01:18,713 The great one... 32 00:01:19,380 --> 00:01:21,088 Wayne fuckin' Gretzky... 33 00:01:21,963 --> 00:01:24,880 coming to Halifax! Today! Oh, I'm losing it again! 34 00:01:25,005 --> 00:01:26,963 Seriously? That's fucking crazy.  35 00:01:27,046 --> 00:01:29,046 I know it's fucking crazy, Ricky! 36 00:01:29,130 --> 00:01:30,088 Oh, my Gosh. 37 00:01:30,380 --> 00:01:34,463 A bunch of NHL superstars are flying in for a celebrity sports banquet. 38 00:01:34,546 --> 00:01:36,046 Wayne's one of them, boys! 39 00:01:36,130 --> 00:01:38,671 -Wayne fucking Gretzky! -You got tickets for this? 40 00:01:38,755 --> 00:01:41,588 No, I don't have fucking tickets. They're $300 each. 41 00:01:41,671 --> 00:01:44,588 But you know Ronnie, that works  the luggage down at the airport? 42 00:01:44,671 --> 00:01:46,505 Says they're coming in this afternoon. 43 00:01:46,588 --> 00:01:49,130 Let's do this. Who's driving?  Get the fuck in the car. 44 00:01:49,380 --> 00:01:51,005 Not one of us. We gotta work today. 45 00:01:51,088 --> 00:01:52,546 Sorry. Can't you go by yourself? 46 00:01:52,630 --> 00:01:54,505 It's one of the biggest moments of my life 47 00:01:54,588 --> 00:01:57,130 and I thought my two best friends might share it with me. 48 00:01:57,421 --> 00:01:59,505 And who's gonna hold  my hyperventilation bag 49 00:01:59,588 --> 00:02:01,171 if I pass out and shit myself? 50 00:02:16,713 --> 00:02:18,380 Bubs, why'd you bring your gear bag? 51 00:02:18,463 --> 00:02:21,921 I got an extra set in case Wayne  wants to get suited up for a picture. 52 00:02:22,088 --> 00:02:24,296 -He's not going to want to do that. -He might. 53 00:02:25,046 --> 00:02:27,630 Just got to get the perfect spot  to head him off. 54 00:02:27,796 --> 00:02:29,296 Stalker styles. 55 00:02:29,380 --> 00:02:32,046 Don't have to worry about that shit. There he fucking is. 56 00:02:32,130 --> 00:02:33,421 Oh my fuck! 57 00:02:33,755 --> 00:02:36,213 Sid, Nate, and Wayne. 58 00:02:36,796 --> 00:02:38,755 The triumpharant of hockey cool. 59 00:02:39,088 --> 00:02:40,380 Over here, you dicks! 60 00:02:41,046 --> 00:02:43,671 Look at him. Oh my fuck! 61 00:02:44,088 --> 00:02:45,921 What do I do, boys? What do I say? 62 00:02:46,005 --> 00:02:47,005 I'm freaking out! 63 00:02:47,130 --> 00:02:50,005 Oh, baby. Bag! Let's go! Bag! 64 00:02:51,380 --> 00:02:52,338 Be cool, Bubs. 65 00:02:52,421 --> 00:02:54,838 Yeah, they're just fucking humans  like us, man. 66 00:02:54,921 --> 00:02:56,921 Oh, yeah. Just humans like you and me, 67 00:02:57,005 --> 00:03:00,130 except they literally shit NHL records. 68 00:03:00,296 --> 00:03:02,130 Oh, look at Wayne, boys. 69 00:03:02,421 --> 00:03:03,505 Look at the grace. 70 00:03:03,630 --> 00:03:05,421 Great one, incoming. 71 00:03:06,005 --> 00:03:08,921 -Oh, what the fuck? -You gotta be fucking kidding me. 72 00:03:09,046 --> 00:03:10,588 The Moncton Mudslide! 73 00:03:10,671 --> 00:03:11,921 Fucking dicks! 74 00:03:12,505 --> 00:03:14,255 I hate those fucking guys. 75 00:03:14,338 --> 00:03:16,963 They've played those dicks from Moncton Marsh Trailer Park 76 00:03:17,046 --> 00:03:19,213 for last ten years  in the Weed Cup Championship 77 00:03:19,296 --> 00:03:21,296 and they lost every single fucking time. 78 00:03:21,380 --> 00:03:22,630 That's because they cheat. 79 00:03:22,713 --> 00:03:25,005 Fucking assholes bringing  junior B hockey players, 80 00:03:25,088 --> 00:03:26,338 they don't live in Moncton. 81 00:03:26,713 --> 00:03:29,463 A while back we supplied this crazy cool trophy for the game, 82 00:03:29,546 --> 00:03:32,380 and those Ski-Doo-driving log fuckers cheated and fucking won. 83 00:03:32,463 --> 00:03:34,796 And we've never won the fucking thing back. 84 00:03:35,463 --> 00:03:37,463 Dirty cock suckers! 85 00:03:37,588 --> 00:03:39,755 I can't believe they brought  the Stanley Bong! 86 00:03:39,880 --> 00:03:41,880 I know. Look at that fucking thing. 87 00:03:42,255 --> 00:03:44,255 It was a true works of the art, buddy. 88 00:03:44,546 --> 00:03:47,255 I built the Stanley Bong for us, 20 years ago. 89 00:03:47,671 --> 00:03:50,796 It has a piece of all of our lives incorporated into the design. 90 00:03:50,921 --> 00:03:54,880 I used the steering wheel  from Ricky's dad's old 18-wheeler wreck 91 00:03:54,963 --> 00:03:56,505 that he almost fucking died in. 92 00:03:56,588 --> 00:03:59,755 And used the milk jug that Julian's dad used as a liquor still. 93 00:03:59,880 --> 00:04:03,338 On the top, beautiful kitty milk bowl  my grandmother used to own. 94 00:04:03,421 --> 00:04:05,463 God bless her, she's a deady now. 95 00:04:05,588 --> 00:04:09,505 Don't mean to brag, but I think it might be nicer than the real Stanley Cup. 96 00:04:09,713 --> 00:04:12,921 Then, of course, Ricky had to jam four chambers into the fucking thing 97 00:04:13,005 --> 00:04:14,380 and turn it into a bong. 98 00:04:14,463 --> 00:04:18,088 But my fuck, does four chambers ever get you baked. 99 00:04:18,671 --> 00:04:20,755 It's making my lungs water  just looking at it. 100 00:04:20,838 --> 00:04:23,546 I've never been higher than when  I smoked from that trophy. 101 00:04:23,630 --> 00:04:25,255 Fucking Moncton Mudslide. 102 00:04:25,338 --> 00:04:27,130 There isn't a mountain near Moncton. 103 00:04:27,213 --> 00:04:29,171 How the fuck is there gonna be a mudslide? 104 00:04:29,255 --> 00:04:31,296 No way! Look who it is, boys. 105 00:04:31,463 --> 00:04:35,046 Hey guys, check out these losers. Rocking the full gear, are ya, goggles? 106 00:04:35,130 --> 00:04:38,546 Better fuck off with that goggle stuff, diarrhea shit face! 107 00:04:38,630 --> 00:04:41,130 We beat those losers every year in a hockey tournament. 108 00:04:41,213 --> 00:04:42,630 Right on. That's great, guys. 109 00:04:42,713 --> 00:04:44,755 They suck so bad, they don't play anymore. 110 00:04:44,838 --> 00:04:45,796 Well, that's too bad. 111 00:04:45,880 --> 00:04:48,463 I think hockey should be  about fun and sportsmanship. 112 00:04:48,546 --> 00:04:49,963 Miss this thing, Ricky dicky? 113 00:04:50,046 --> 00:04:51,880 You want to come take a sucking off it? 114 00:04:51,963 --> 00:04:54,880 You cheating cock twisters go fuck your mothers and sisters 115 00:04:54,963 --> 00:04:56,796 and fathers right in the fucking ass! 116 00:04:56,880 --> 00:04:57,755 Jesus. 117 00:04:57,838 --> 00:05:00,171 You guys ever going to play  in the Weed Cup again? 118 00:05:00,255 --> 00:05:01,546 Oh yeah, no point, 119 00:05:01,630 --> 00:05:03,046 because you fucking suck. 120 00:05:03,130 --> 00:05:05,463 Actually, load-breath, our team is better than ever. 121 00:05:05,546 --> 00:05:06,630 We'd destroy you fucks. 122 00:05:06,713 --> 00:05:08,755 We don't play in the Weed Cup, it's lame 123 00:05:08,838 --> 00:05:10,630 it'd be too fucking easy for us to win. 124 00:05:10,713 --> 00:05:12,005 Right. Nice try, fatty. 125 00:05:14,546 --> 00:05:17,171 Suck my fucking cock, Neil! 126 00:05:17,255 --> 00:05:19,838 You want to fucking play?  Let's fucking play! 127 00:05:19,921 --> 00:05:21,713 Come on, you toothless whore bag! 128 00:05:24,671 --> 00:05:26,213 Oh, I don't think so, bud. 129 00:05:26,296 --> 00:05:27,213 Fucker! 130 00:05:27,671 --> 00:05:29,505 Fuckin' back your paws off me! 131 00:05:29,963 --> 00:05:32,963 Wayne! Holy fuck,  can I get a picture, please? 132 00:05:33,046 --> 00:05:33,963 Please! 133 00:05:34,338 --> 00:05:36,713 -Dicks! -God fucking damn you, Ricky! 134 00:05:36,796 --> 00:05:39,171 I didn't get to meet my hero.  Thanks a lot! 135 00:05:39,255 --> 00:05:41,796 It wasn't my fucking fault. Can't blame me for that shit. 136 00:05:41,880 --> 00:05:42,921 I can blame you! 137 00:05:43,088 --> 00:05:44,505 This isn't over, cock-snackers. 138 00:05:44,588 --> 00:05:46,630 We'll get that trophy one way or the other. 139 00:05:46,755 --> 00:05:47,963 Play us for it, lard-ass. 140 00:05:48,046 --> 00:05:49,588 We'll embarrass the shit outa you. 141 00:05:49,671 --> 00:05:51,546 Oh yeah? You think so, pussies? 142 00:05:51,671 --> 00:05:53,505 Us against you. One game. 143 00:05:53,588 --> 00:05:54,630 Winner gets the trophy. 144 00:05:54,755 --> 00:05:56,546 We'll hold you cock-squeezers to this. 145 00:05:56,630 --> 00:05:59,338 When they ice the rink in the fall, you're going down! 146 00:05:59,421 --> 00:06:01,421 No. This can't fucking wait until fall. 147 00:06:01,505 --> 00:06:03,421 Bubbles can build an outdoor rink, easy. 148 00:06:03,505 --> 00:06:05,213 What? Ricky, it's the summer. 149 00:06:05,296 --> 00:06:08,005 Can you do it or not? Don't make me look like a dick, Bubs. 150 00:06:08,088 --> 00:06:10,505 Jesus, Ricky! Technically, if I had... 151 00:06:10,630 --> 00:06:12,796 a couple of industrial refrigeration units 152 00:06:12,880 --> 00:06:16,296 -and maybe tapped into a fire hydrant-- -Perfect! That's all I need to know. 153 00:06:16,671 --> 00:06:19,046 Sunnyvale Trailer Park,  tomorrow, two o'clock. 154 00:06:19,380 --> 00:06:22,213 Tomorrow? No, impossible!  You're fucking insane. 155 00:06:22,296 --> 00:06:24,255 It's fucking on, you fat bitch. 156 00:06:24,338 --> 00:06:26,838 I said that to your mother as I put my cock in her ear! 157 00:06:26,921 --> 00:06:28,171 Jesus, Ricky! 158 00:06:28,755 --> 00:06:32,213 Oh, it was really nice  to meet you today, Bubbles. 159 00:06:32,463 --> 00:06:35,088 Oh fuck,  it was nice meeting you too, Wayne. 160 00:06:35,171 --> 00:06:37,713 What a thrill. Thanks for the picture. 161 00:06:37,796 --> 00:06:41,630 Oh, wait, I didn't get a fucking picture because my friends are fucked! 162 00:06:44,255 --> 00:06:46,338 Hey, buddy. How are you doing, man? 163 00:06:46,421 --> 00:06:47,921 I've been fucking better. 164 00:06:48,005 --> 00:06:49,380 Goddamn Ricky. 165 00:06:49,463 --> 00:06:52,713 It's times like this I question  my friendship with that raging lunatic. 166 00:06:52,796 --> 00:06:54,255 I know, man. I hear you. 167 00:06:54,588 --> 00:06:56,588 He loves you, though. You know that, right? 168 00:06:56,671 --> 00:06:57,838 Yeah, well... 169 00:06:57,921 --> 00:07:00,130 He's got a fucked up way  of showing it, Julian. 170 00:07:00,296 --> 00:07:01,838 I know you want some space, 171 00:07:01,921 --> 00:07:04,380 but we don't have a lot of time to pull this together. 172 00:07:04,463 --> 00:07:06,171 So we're actually fucking doing this. 173 00:07:06,255 --> 00:07:08,588 Well, everyone's out getting everything you need. 174 00:07:08,671 --> 00:07:10,838 You did say you could build a hockey rink. 175 00:07:10,921 --> 00:07:13,171 -Well-- -If you can't, that's fine, but, 176 00:07:13,255 --> 00:07:16,380 It sucks that your cats will never drink out of granny's dish again. 177 00:07:16,505 --> 00:07:18,255 I mean, you know, but I get it. 178 00:07:18,338 --> 00:07:22,130 Julian, keep my kitties out of your reverse psychology bullshit. 179 00:07:22,213 --> 00:07:23,921 -I'm not falling for it. -Julian, 180 00:07:24,005 --> 00:07:26,255 we need to talk right the frig now. 181 00:07:26,421 --> 00:07:29,171 Lot fees. You and Ricky both, or you're gone. 182 00:07:29,255 --> 00:07:31,005 What the fuck are you saying, Randy? 183 00:07:31,296 --> 00:07:33,463 I'm sick of you guys  taking advantage of me. 184 00:07:33,546 --> 00:07:35,546 And Barb's been riding me friggin' hard. 185 00:07:35,630 --> 00:07:38,213 Lot fees today  or you're kicked out of the friggin' park. 186 00:07:38,296 --> 00:07:40,630 -I'm friggin' serious. -Randy, calm the fuck down. 187 00:07:40,713 --> 00:07:41,838 We're broke, okay? 188 00:07:41,921 --> 00:07:43,338 I'll get it to you tomorrow. 189 00:07:43,463 --> 00:07:45,463 We've got this ice hockey game on today. 190 00:07:45,546 --> 00:07:48,880 There's going to be tons of people. Tons of people means tons of money. 191 00:07:48,963 --> 00:07:51,421 You know what?  This could be a real good opportunity 192 00:07:51,505 --> 00:07:53,380 for you to impress Barb for once. 193 00:07:53,546 --> 00:07:55,421 -How? -Think about it, man. 194 00:07:55,546 --> 00:07:58,505 I'll let you sell cheeseburgers. That puts cash in your pocket. 195 00:07:58,588 --> 00:08:01,421 I make cash to pay the lot fees, and you'll impress Barb 196 00:08:01,505 --> 00:08:03,838 as you took charge and solved everyone's problems. 197 00:08:03,921 --> 00:08:04,921 You're the big hero. 198 00:08:05,005 --> 00:08:07,171 I mean, who's really in charge  of this park? 199 00:08:07,255 --> 00:08:08,296 Barb or you? 200 00:08:08,380 --> 00:08:12,296 I guess I am, technically. But we better make some friggin' money. 201 00:08:12,380 --> 00:08:15,630 When do I ever do something  that doesn't make money, Randy? 202 00:08:15,880 --> 00:08:19,588 Julian, if we do manage to build  this fucking rink in the middle of summer, 203 00:08:19,671 --> 00:08:22,046 how in the name of Jesus's holy nut sack 204 00:08:22,130 --> 00:08:24,588 do you figure we're gonna  fucking beat those guys? 205 00:08:24,671 --> 00:08:26,713 Ricky's gonna talk to Darren at the rink. 206 00:08:26,796 --> 00:08:28,796 His cousin played fucking Junior A. 207 00:08:28,880 --> 00:08:30,838 If he plays for us, man, were laughing. 208 00:08:30,963 --> 00:08:35,130 Julian seems to think it's just  a walk in the park to build a goddamn rink 209 00:08:35,213 --> 00:08:36,546 in the middle of summer. 210 00:08:36,838 --> 00:08:40,130 Thankfully we were able to get  some nice lumber from Reggie 211 00:08:40,213 --> 00:08:42,088 'cause he'll take weed for anything. 212 00:08:42,630 --> 00:08:44,171 And Cory and Jacob, I must say, 213 00:08:44,255 --> 00:08:46,463 they did get  some nice refrigeration units. 214 00:08:46,546 --> 00:08:48,505 But I don't wanna know  where they got them. 215 00:08:48,588 --> 00:08:50,296 There's bullet holes in them. 216 00:08:52,546 --> 00:08:55,838 Ricky, check it out. We're gonna to put the water to it soon. 217 00:08:55,963 --> 00:08:57,588 Right on, boys. Looking good. 218 00:08:57,796 --> 00:08:59,463 Yeah, she's coming along, Ricky. 219 00:08:59,546 --> 00:09:01,838 How'd it go with Darren's cousin? Is he playing? 220 00:09:01,921 --> 00:09:04,338 No, he's not.  Fucking asshole wouldn't play for weed. 221 00:09:04,421 --> 00:09:05,546 What a fucking loser. 222 00:09:05,630 --> 00:09:06,963 So we're fucked, then. 223 00:09:07,046 --> 00:09:08,838 No, we're good, actually. 224 00:09:11,463 --> 00:09:13,671 Oh my fuck! Nathan MacKinnon! 225 00:09:13,755 --> 00:09:15,588 -What have you done? -What do you mean? 226 00:09:15,671 --> 00:09:18,005 What's your problem? You play with a pro superstar 227 00:09:18,088 --> 00:09:19,421 and we get our bong back. 228 00:09:19,505 --> 00:09:22,005 -You guys should be high-fiving me. -Oh my fuck, Ricky! 229 00:09:22,088 --> 00:09:23,213 This is insane. 230 00:09:23,296 --> 00:09:25,630 Look, if you were  gonna risk jail over it... 231 00:09:25,755 --> 00:09:28,546 -Why didn't you just grab Wayne? -I fucking tried to get him, 232 00:09:28,630 --> 00:09:31,005 but he did a crazy spin  in the lobby, deeked me out. 233 00:09:31,088 --> 00:09:32,838 Fuck, you shoulda saw him. Incredible. 234 00:09:32,921 --> 00:09:35,713 Decent. So he's still got the moves. 235 00:09:36,046 --> 00:09:38,463 Oh my God. I'm sorry about this, Nathan. 236 00:09:38,546 --> 00:09:40,838 Look, my friend's not quite right in the head. 237 00:09:40,921 --> 00:09:43,088 We're supposed to play a hockey game to win back 238 00:09:43,171 --> 00:09:45,671 a trophy I built years ago,  and we don't have a chance, 239 00:09:45,755 --> 00:09:47,838 so I think Ricky was maybe thinking-- 240 00:09:47,963 --> 00:09:49,880 -Are you guys going to kill me? -Kill you? 241 00:09:49,963 --> 00:09:51,713 Oh my God, no! Jesus Murphy. 242 00:09:51,796 --> 00:09:53,296 We're huge fans of yours, 243 00:09:53,380 --> 00:09:54,838 and we've never killed anyone. 244 00:09:54,921 --> 00:09:57,088 I swear to fuck,  we have not killed anyone. 245 00:09:57,171 --> 00:09:59,505 -What the fuck are you doing? -We're letting him go. 246 00:09:59,588 --> 00:10:00,796 -What? -Oh, thank God. 247 00:10:00,880 --> 00:10:03,296 So we're going to play against Moncton and lose again. 248 00:10:03,380 --> 00:10:05,255 -I guess so. -Oh my fuck. Fine! 249 00:10:05,338 --> 00:10:07,796 My one chance to win for the first time in my life, 250 00:10:07,880 --> 00:10:09,755 you just throw it away? Thanks, Julian. 251 00:10:09,838 --> 00:10:12,088 I'll never know what it's like  to win something. 252 00:10:12,171 --> 00:10:13,755 You've never won anything before? 253 00:10:13,838 --> 00:10:15,630 No, I haven't, fuck-brains. 254 00:10:15,713 --> 00:10:17,046 -Nothing ever? -Nothing. 255 00:10:17,130 --> 00:10:19,130 -A participation trophy? -Nope. 256 00:10:19,213 --> 00:10:21,630 -A gold star sticker in school? -Not once. 257 00:10:21,713 --> 00:10:23,046 -A tug-of-war? -Nope. 258 00:10:23,130 --> 00:10:24,505 -A scratch ticket. -No! 259 00:10:24,588 --> 00:10:26,463 -Roll up the Rim to Win? -Nothing. 260 00:10:26,546 --> 00:10:28,255 -A coin toss? -Not once. 261 00:10:28,338 --> 00:10:29,380 You call it. 262 00:10:30,088 --> 00:10:32,088 Let's try for heads. What the fuck? 263 00:10:32,588 --> 00:10:33,463 Told ya. 264 00:10:34,005 --> 00:10:36,171 Let's go for the fucking tails. 265 00:10:36,255 --> 00:10:37,588 It's not gonna happen, bud. 266 00:10:37,796 --> 00:10:40,880 Wow, you've gotta be one of the only human beings on the planet 267 00:10:40,963 --> 00:10:43,088 -who's never won anything. -That's nice. Yeah. 268 00:10:43,171 --> 00:10:45,130 So what's your fucking point, ass-face? 269 00:10:45,213 --> 00:10:47,213 That's one of the saddest things I've heard. 270 00:10:47,296 --> 00:10:49,130 It is sad. It's very sad. 271 00:10:49,213 --> 00:10:51,796 You know what, guys? I'm gonna help you win that game. 272 00:10:51,880 --> 00:10:54,380 Everyone needs to feel like a winner once in their life. 273 00:10:54,463 --> 00:10:56,171 Are you serious? Holy fuck! 274 00:10:56,463 --> 00:10:59,588 I'm gonna play in a hockey game  with Nathan fuckin' MacKinnon! 275 00:10:59,671 --> 00:11:00,630 Fuckin' awesome! 276 00:11:01,338 --> 00:11:02,213 Anybody hungry? 277 00:11:02,546 --> 00:11:04,088 THE CASK STEAKHOUSE 278 00:11:04,213 --> 00:11:05,171 Hey, Nathan. 279 00:11:05,296 --> 00:11:07,005 -Call me Nate. -Hey, Nate, 280 00:11:07,088 --> 00:11:08,505 so when you were on the plane, 281 00:11:08,713 --> 00:11:12,255 did Wayne recline his seat  or did he just sit upright the whole way? 282 00:11:12,463 --> 00:11:14,005 I don't really remember. 283 00:11:14,088 --> 00:11:15,630 Slightly reclined, maybe? 284 00:11:15,713 --> 00:11:16,796 Decent. 285 00:11:16,880 --> 00:11:19,463 Did Wayne watch a movie or is he a book fella? 286 00:11:19,546 --> 00:11:20,546 Or did he sleep? 287 00:11:20,630 --> 00:11:22,630 I'm not sure, Bubs. I was napping. 288 00:11:22,796 --> 00:11:26,088 Does Wayne open his air vent on the plane or is he already cool enough? 289 00:11:26,171 --> 00:11:29,005 Holy fuck, Bubs, man. Enough with Gretzky questions. 290 00:11:29,088 --> 00:11:31,671 I'm just making conversation  with my teammate, Julian. 291 00:11:31,755 --> 00:11:32,880 Back the fuck off! 292 00:11:33,088 --> 00:11:37,796 Oh, my fuck. 41 fucking ribs. I didn't know a pig had that many ribs. 293 00:11:37,880 --> 00:11:39,671 Didn't come from one pig, Ricky. 294 00:11:39,755 --> 00:11:41,421 And those are beef ribs, anyway. 295 00:11:41,505 --> 00:11:43,130 -Yeah, I know. -That's it, I'm done. 296 00:11:43,213 --> 00:11:45,296 I can't believe I ate two whole chickens. 297 00:11:45,380 --> 00:11:47,380 -Yeah, that was great food. -Hear that, boys? 298 00:11:47,463 --> 00:11:49,796 Nathan MacKinnon loved  the food we got him. 299 00:11:49,880 --> 00:11:51,380 Think Gretzky woulda liked it? 300 00:11:51,463 --> 00:11:53,880 Bubs! You sound like a fucking idiot, man. 301 00:11:53,963 --> 00:11:55,088 I can't help it, Julian! 302 00:11:55,171 --> 00:11:57,921 I'm sitting here with somebody  that knows Wayne Gretzky. 303 00:11:58,005 --> 00:12:00,088 There's only two people  I ever wanted to meet: 304 00:12:00,171 --> 00:12:02,588 Wayne Gretzky... and Luke Skywalker. 305 00:12:02,671 --> 00:12:04,921 No way. I'm a huge Star Wars fan, too. 306 00:12:05,046 --> 00:12:06,713 Decent. 307 00:12:07,588 --> 00:12:09,296 Can I interest anyone in dessert? 308 00:12:09,588 --> 00:12:11,963 Not unless you got an extra stomach you can lend me. 309 00:12:12,046 --> 00:12:14,671 I'm as stuffed as a ten-holed aisle in a cock factory. 310 00:12:14,755 --> 00:12:17,088 Ricky, for God's sakes, have some couth. 311 00:12:17,463 --> 00:12:18,755 I can't, I'm stuffed. 312 00:12:18,838 --> 00:12:20,088 I think we're fine. 313 00:12:20,796 --> 00:12:22,963 That's definitely  a rich and fancy type bill. 314 00:12:23,046 --> 00:12:24,338 -There you go, bud. -What? 315 00:12:24,421 --> 00:12:27,213 -I don't have my wallet, guys. -What the fuck are you saying? 316 00:12:27,338 --> 00:12:29,838 I didn't have time to grab it when you kidnapped me. 317 00:12:29,963 --> 00:12:31,255 That makes sense. 318 00:12:31,338 --> 00:12:33,713 Honestly, I thought you guys were taking care of it, 319 00:12:33,796 --> 00:12:35,921 since seeing how I'm doing you a favor. 320 00:12:36,005 --> 00:12:37,380 That's what you thought? Okay. 321 00:12:37,588 --> 00:12:39,005 We can take care of it, then. 322 00:12:39,088 --> 00:12:40,755 No problem. Ready, boys? 323 00:12:40,838 --> 00:12:42,088 -Ready for what? -Bolt! 324 00:12:44,546 --> 00:12:45,713 Cash or credit, sir? 325 00:12:46,171 --> 00:12:48,130 I don't have either, actually. 326 00:12:50,171 --> 00:12:52,463 There seems to be some kind of  a mix-up, officer. 327 00:12:52,546 --> 00:12:54,796 -I'm actually Nathan-- -I know who you are, kid. 328 00:12:54,880 --> 00:12:57,671 I was the London Knights fan club president back in 2013 329 00:12:57,755 --> 00:13:00,463 when you and the Halifax Mooseheads beat us to win the cup. 330 00:13:00,546 --> 00:13:02,838 Seven goals, six assists in four games? 331 00:13:02,921 --> 00:13:05,421 We supposed to win that year, you rotten son of a bitch. 332 00:13:05,505 --> 00:13:06,755 I was just playing hockey. 333 00:13:06,880 --> 00:13:09,255 Just get in the fucking car. 334 00:13:10,130 --> 00:13:11,671 Just get in the fucking car! 335 00:13:14,713 --> 00:13:16,130 All right, perfect. 336 00:13:16,296 --> 00:13:17,546 The rink is done! 337 00:13:17,630 --> 00:13:20,046 Nice work, buddy. It looks fucking amazing. 338 00:13:20,130 --> 00:13:21,630 The ice is good, dude. 339 00:13:21,713 --> 00:13:23,796 -It's solid.  -And slidy too! 340 00:13:24,588 --> 00:13:26,796 Yeah, two essential components of ice. 341 00:13:26,880 --> 00:13:29,213 Gettin' really good with the adjectives, boys! 342 00:13:29,296 --> 00:13:31,505 Oh man,  the fucking rink looks great, boys. 343 00:13:31,588 --> 00:13:33,130 Here, put these up on the boards. 344 00:13:33,213 --> 00:13:34,505 What? What are they? 345 00:13:34,588 --> 00:13:36,130 Sponsors. I sold ad space. 346 00:13:36,213 --> 00:13:37,380 Ad space? 347 00:13:37,630 --> 00:13:40,213 Julian, you need to get focused  on what's important here. 348 00:13:40,296 --> 00:13:43,338 I am focused on what's important. Making money. 349 00:13:43,421 --> 00:13:45,755 I knew Nathan MacKinnon was  a famous hockey player, 350 00:13:45,838 --> 00:13:48,546 but I had no idea how much of a fucking goldmine he is. 351 00:13:48,630 --> 00:13:51,088 Soon as I handed out flyers saying he was playing here, 352 00:13:51,171 --> 00:13:53,296 people couldn't fucking wait to spend money. 353 00:13:53,380 --> 00:13:55,421 I'm selling VIP sky boxes. 354 00:13:55,505 --> 00:13:57,796 I've got autographed pictures  of him to sell. 355 00:13:57,880 --> 00:14:00,713 I've got booze and food on the go, 60% cut off of that. 356 00:14:00,796 --> 00:14:02,171 I've got a weed booth. 357 00:14:02,255 --> 00:14:04,755 I even got a VIP club booth  where you can, well... 358 00:14:04,838 --> 00:14:07,505 Like a kissing booth but instead of getting things kissed, 359 00:14:07,588 --> 00:14:09,671 you may get things licked or sucked. 360 00:14:09,755 --> 00:14:11,630 It'll be a big hit with the hockey fans. 361 00:14:11,713 --> 00:14:13,296 It's time to get down to business. 362 00:14:13,380 --> 00:14:15,838 Get them jaws loose. Time to get them working. 363 00:14:19,005 --> 00:14:21,171 Show them where the chickens go to shit! 364 00:14:23,171 --> 00:14:25,130 Where in the fuck is MacKinnon? 365 00:14:25,213 --> 00:14:27,338 I thought you were looking after that. 366 00:14:27,421 --> 00:14:30,255 -You said you'd take care of everything. -I thought you were. 367 00:14:30,338 --> 00:14:32,755 You're the one with a hard on since he agreed to play. 368 00:14:32,838 --> 00:14:36,671 Ricky, I was building a fucking rink, in case you didn't notice. 369 00:14:36,755 --> 00:14:39,880 What? You got to be fucking kidding me. 370 00:14:39,963 --> 00:14:41,130 MacKinnon's in jail. 371 00:14:41,213 --> 00:14:42,505 -Shut the fuck up. -Jail?! 372 00:14:42,630 --> 00:14:43,713 Holy fuck! 373 00:14:43,796 --> 00:14:45,880 Oh, yeah. We're fucked now, boys. 374 00:14:46,213 --> 00:14:47,505 Are you guys ready to go? 375 00:14:47,838 --> 00:14:50,713 We're missing one of our players. We need to wait for a bit. 376 00:14:50,921 --> 00:14:53,213 No, I got a dentist appointment  in an hour, guys. 377 00:14:53,338 --> 00:14:55,505 It's now or never. You're gonna play or forfeit. 378 00:14:55,588 --> 00:14:56,921 What are you gonna do, homos? 379 00:14:57,005 --> 00:15:00,255 If you forfeit, you lose anyway, so you may as well let us humiliate ya. 380 00:15:00,338 --> 00:15:01,463 The people want a show. 381 00:15:03,505 --> 00:15:05,296 You guys are such fucking losers. 382 00:15:05,838 --> 00:15:06,713 Fuck this. 383 00:15:06,796 --> 00:15:09,421 We can win this with or without  Nathan fucking MacKinnon. 384 00:15:09,505 --> 00:15:10,338 Let's play! 385 00:15:13,088 --> 00:15:13,963 Fuck! 386 00:15:18,171 --> 00:15:19,046 Fuck's sakes! 387 00:15:19,130 --> 00:15:20,588 Fuck you, Ricky! You suck! 388 00:15:25,421 --> 00:15:27,046 Come on! What the fuck was that? 389 00:15:27,963 --> 00:15:30,005 -Fuckin' dick! -Move your ass! 390 00:15:32,171 --> 00:15:33,046 Fuck! 391 00:15:33,130 --> 00:15:35,130 -We want MacKinnon! -You guys suck! 392 00:15:35,421 --> 00:15:38,546 We want MacKinnon! 393 00:15:38,796 --> 00:15:40,921 Fuck you, Moncton! 394 00:15:41,546 --> 00:15:43,546 Get the fuck outa the way, cum-hair. 395 00:15:46,796 --> 00:15:48,088 Cock suck! 396 00:15:48,505 --> 00:15:51,171 All right! Jesus Christ!  Two minutes for... 397 00:15:51,463 --> 00:15:53,255 -whatever the hell that was. -What? 398 00:15:53,338 --> 00:15:55,713 Are you kidding me? Fuck off, my stick slipped. 399 00:15:55,880 --> 00:15:57,463 Can you get him out or what? 400 00:15:57,546 --> 00:16:00,796 Oh, I can get them out,  but Chief Johnson is being a hard-ass. 401 00:16:00,880 --> 00:16:02,546 It's gonna be two gees with my fees, 402 00:16:02,630 --> 00:16:04,963 and hockey boy here  doesn't have his wallet. 403 00:16:05,046 --> 00:16:06,588 Jesus Christ, Steinberg. 404 00:16:06,671 --> 00:16:07,505 Just invoice him. 405 00:16:07,588 --> 00:16:09,588 He's rich for fuck's sakes, good for it. 406 00:16:10,046 --> 00:16:11,713 Ooh, yeah. 407 00:16:12,005 --> 00:16:14,630 But if he fucks me, that two gees is on you. 408 00:16:14,755 --> 00:16:16,838 He's not gonna fuck ya. Just get him here. 409 00:16:17,546 --> 00:16:19,338 Okay kid, all taken care of. 410 00:16:19,505 --> 00:16:20,796 It's going to be eight... 411 00:16:21,005 --> 00:16:22,713 ten, twe-- could be... 412 00:16:22,963 --> 00:16:25,921 Well, let's just say  between eight and fifty gees. 413 00:16:26,005 --> 00:16:27,255 No problem. 414 00:16:27,338 --> 00:16:28,505 Plus my fees, of course. 415 00:16:28,588 --> 00:16:30,963 Whatever. I got to get out. Call my accountant. 416 00:16:31,463 --> 00:16:33,005 Where the fuck is MacKinnon? 417 00:16:34,505 --> 00:16:36,088 We need to see MacKinnon! 418 00:16:36,463 --> 00:16:39,171 It's fucking amazing  how bad you guys suck! 419 00:16:39,296 --> 00:16:41,088 Might as well get back in there, Cory. 420 00:16:42,046 --> 00:16:43,255 Fuck you, Neil! 421 00:16:43,671 --> 00:16:45,463 -Five minutes. -Five? For what? 422 00:16:45,630 --> 00:16:48,255 You! With the long arms. In the box! 423 00:16:48,338 --> 00:16:49,921 I give up. We're two men down now. 424 00:16:50,005 --> 00:16:52,296 Julian, these people were promised Nathan MacKinnon 425 00:16:52,380 --> 00:16:53,838 and they want Nathan MacKinnon. 426 00:16:53,921 --> 00:16:56,088 They're getting rowdy and stealing burgers now. 427 00:16:56,171 --> 00:16:58,046 He's on his way. Tell them to chill out. 428 00:16:58,130 --> 00:16:59,255 You pay for that burger? 429 00:16:59,338 --> 00:17:01,338 Julian, the freaking burger is not important. 430 00:17:01,421 --> 00:17:02,671 They won't chill out. 431 00:17:02,755 --> 00:17:05,171 They're betting on this game  for frick's sakes. 432 00:17:08,671 --> 00:17:10,713 -This isn't the airport. -It isn't? 433 00:17:10,963 --> 00:17:12,088 Sorry, got to go. 434 00:17:14,296 --> 00:17:15,421 Okay, time out. 435 00:17:15,505 --> 00:17:17,671 -About fucking time, man. -Are you guys serious? 436 00:17:17,755 --> 00:17:19,380 Left in a restaurant with no money. 437 00:17:19,463 --> 00:17:21,088 Do you not understand "bolt"? 438 00:17:21,171 --> 00:17:22,213 Fuck, you're dumb. 439 00:17:22,338 --> 00:17:24,296 Sorry, Nate. We thought you knew the code. 440 00:17:24,380 --> 00:17:26,380 I mean, you're from Coal Harbor. 441 00:17:27,088 --> 00:17:28,421 So you still going to play? 442 00:17:28,505 --> 00:17:31,838 I think it might be better if I go home. I haven't seen my parents yet. 443 00:17:31,921 --> 00:17:33,796 Oh, is that right? Your parents can wait! 444 00:17:35,005 --> 00:17:37,088 -I guess I'm playing. -That's what I thought. 445 00:17:37,171 --> 00:17:40,380 Get your fucking skates on and score some fucking goals, superstar. 446 00:17:40,713 --> 00:17:42,130 I'm Steve Rogers. 447 00:17:42,255 --> 00:17:45,588 Ladies and gentlemen,  Sunnyvale's late addition to the roster: 448 00:17:45,713 --> 00:17:47,796 Number 29 in your program, 449 00:17:48,130 --> 00:17:49,671 number one in your hearts. 450 00:17:49,755 --> 00:17:51,296 Our hometown hero... 451 00:17:51,546 --> 00:17:52,880 Nathan MacKinnon. 452 00:17:55,296 --> 00:17:56,588 I'm Steve Rogers. 453 00:17:58,463 --> 00:18:00,213 Yeah, that's right, dickheads. 454 00:18:00,338 --> 00:18:02,838 Nathan fucking MacKinnon  just stepped on the ice, 455 00:18:02,921 --> 00:18:04,463 and guess who he's playing for? 456 00:18:04,588 --> 00:18:05,755 Sunnyvale! 457 00:18:05,838 --> 00:18:08,130 Okay, here we go. The puck has dropped. 458 00:18:08,213 --> 00:18:11,921 MacKinnon scores right away. A beautiful goal. 459 00:18:12,880 --> 00:18:15,005 Sunnyvale really is starting to dominate here. 460 00:18:15,088 --> 00:18:17,088 Look at MacKinnon! He scores again! 461 00:18:18,630 --> 00:18:20,421 A big save by Ricky. 462 00:18:21,338 --> 00:18:22,880 MacKinnon from the red line... 463 00:18:23,296 --> 00:18:26,213 He scores again. Such a pleasure to watch. 464 00:18:27,505 --> 00:18:29,838 Bubbles passes to MacKinnon. MacKinnon winds up. 465 00:18:29,921 --> 00:18:32,546 Tops it off! We have a tie game, folks. 466 00:18:33,171 --> 00:18:34,921 -Center! -What the fuck are you doing? 467 00:18:35,005 --> 00:18:36,088 I need a rest. 468 00:18:36,171 --> 00:18:38,213 I've been on the ice for 12 minutes. 469 00:18:38,296 --> 00:18:40,755 You're in your 20s and you're rich. Suck it up, pansy. 470 00:18:44,546 --> 00:18:46,546 MacKinnon takes it long, he's away-- 471 00:18:47,255 --> 00:18:49,380 Down with a violent slash to the leg... 472 00:18:50,088 --> 00:18:51,463 All right. Fuck this! 473 00:18:52,171 --> 00:18:54,005 Fucking pin him to the glass, Ricky! 474 00:18:54,088 --> 00:18:55,005 Fuck you! 475 00:18:55,713 --> 00:18:57,380 More side punches, Cory! 476 00:18:59,463 --> 00:19:01,463 A cheap shot by Moncton. 477 00:19:01,588 --> 00:19:02,546 Oh, my fuck! 478 00:19:02,630 --> 00:19:04,380 Oh my God, where are my glasses, boys? 479 00:19:05,838 --> 00:19:07,046 Penalty shot!  480 00:19:07,130 --> 00:19:08,588 Number 29. 481 00:19:08,671 --> 00:19:09,796 One second on the clock. 482 00:19:09,921 --> 00:19:13,671 It all comes down to  international superstar Nathan MacKinnon! 483 00:19:13,963 --> 00:19:16,963 -My legs! -Fuck! MacKinnon's legs snapped. 484 00:19:17,171 --> 00:19:18,713 That's it, boys. I'm done. 485 00:19:18,880 --> 00:19:21,005 Come on, man.  I can't skate with broken legs. 486 00:19:21,088 --> 00:19:22,838 Someone else must take a penalty shot. 487 00:19:22,921 --> 00:19:25,005 You're the only one who didn't get a penalty. 488 00:19:25,088 --> 00:19:26,880 -Me? -He's over here, Bubs. 489 00:19:27,713 --> 00:19:29,380 The tension in the air is palpable. 490 00:19:29,505 --> 00:19:32,588 Can Bubbles reclaim the Stanley Bong for Sunnyvale? 491 00:19:33,130 --> 00:19:36,130 Jesus, boys.  I don't know if I can do this. 492 00:19:36,213 --> 00:19:37,630 I mean, it's a lot of pressure. 493 00:19:37,713 --> 00:19:38,713 Lift me up, guys. 494 00:19:39,338 --> 00:19:40,713 You can do this, Bubbles. 495 00:19:40,838 --> 00:19:42,421 You just have to use the force. 496 00:19:42,505 --> 00:19:45,421 -What? The force? -Yeah, the force. Like Luke Skywalker. 497 00:19:45,505 --> 00:19:46,880 Most people don't know this, 498 00:19:46,963 --> 00:19:48,713 but whenever I take a penalty shot 499 00:19:48,796 --> 00:19:51,213 or I'm going down on a breakaway, I close my eyes. 500 00:19:51,588 --> 00:19:52,671 Are you serious? 501 00:19:52,796 --> 00:19:56,088 I can sense the goal-scoring force  is strong in you, Bubbles. 502 00:19:56,171 --> 00:19:58,796 Yeah, you're fucking right that the force is strong in you. 503 00:19:58,880 --> 00:20:01,005 -We always knew that too. -You can do is, Bubs. 504 00:20:01,130 --> 00:20:03,296 Remember, "The Force will be with you." 505 00:20:03,921 --> 00:20:05,255 Always. 506 00:20:06,338 --> 00:20:08,963 It looks like Bubbles  is trying to get his focus. 507 00:20:09,838 --> 00:20:12,421 -You don't close your eyes? -Of course not. Are you crazy? 508 00:20:12,505 --> 00:20:15,588 -He's just got a better chance this way. -Hurry up, loser! 509 00:20:15,671 --> 00:20:18,130 We got some weed to smoke  out of this motherfucker. 510 00:20:19,088 --> 00:20:20,880 Use The Force, Bubbles. 511 00:20:21,046 --> 00:20:23,380 Let go, Bubbles... 512 00:20:23,880 --> 00:20:25,296 Just breathe. 513 00:20:26,213 --> 00:20:28,338 Fans on their feet. It's all down to this. 514 00:20:28,463 --> 00:20:29,463 Here he comes...  515 00:20:31,046 --> 00:20:34,796 Oh! He fans on the shot! He's down. How embarrassing! 516 00:20:35,630 --> 00:20:39,296 He won! The puck crosses the line! It's a goal!  517 00:20:41,255 --> 00:20:42,630 Sunnyvale wins! 518 00:20:42,713 --> 00:20:44,630 The Stanley Bong is theirs. 519 00:20:45,796 --> 00:20:48,130 Holy fuck! Did you guys see that? 520 00:20:48,713 --> 00:20:49,546 I didn't.  521 00:20:49,630 --> 00:20:51,130 Don't take shit off 'em, Rick! 522 00:20:51,213 --> 00:20:52,088 Ours! 523 00:20:54,338 --> 00:20:56,755 We did it, buddy! We won the fucking Stanley Bong! 524 00:20:56,880 --> 00:20:59,338 -Yes! -Right on! Yeah! 525 00:21:00,630 --> 00:21:02,630 Thanks, 29 Kenobi. 526 00:21:05,088 --> 00:21:06,171 Thanks, Julian. 527 00:21:06,255 --> 00:21:07,921 Barb's going to be real impressed. 528 00:21:08,005 --> 00:21:10,255 This has been the best day in my life, boys. 529 00:21:10,588 --> 00:21:15,046 I mean, not only did I get to play with Nathan MacKinnon in a hockey game, 530 00:21:15,380 --> 00:21:18,171 It's almost like I got to meet  Luke Skywalker, too. 531 00:21:18,255 --> 00:21:20,338 Bubbles, that was fucking awesome. 532 00:21:20,421 --> 00:21:22,213 I'm so proud of you. 533 00:21:22,296 --> 00:21:23,463 We all are. 534 00:21:23,546 --> 00:21:24,963 Thanks, buddy. Because of you, 535 00:21:25,046 --> 00:21:26,921 I finally know what it is to be a winner. 536 00:21:27,005 --> 00:21:28,213 You are a winner, Ricky. 537 00:21:28,505 --> 00:21:31,130 It feels... quite a bit better  than being a loser. 538 00:21:35,755 --> 00:21:37,838 Oh, fuck yeah! 539 00:21:37,921 --> 00:21:39,463 Fuck, I missed you, baby. 540 00:21:39,588 --> 00:21:41,505 Lord Stanley's octopus toke. 541 00:21:53,921 --> 00:21:55,338 Fucking smooth. 542 00:21:55,796 --> 00:21:57,796 Yep, you're definitely a winner, Ricky.